I have felt like blogging for quite awhile now but every time I
attempted, I became a blank slate. Even though our lives are continuously busy & there is so much to write about, I have simply been without words. So forgive me, this blog will probably not go anywhere. It will simply be me rambling on with no direction or end point in sight. I have never been one for writing. Frankly, my writing ability sucks (for lack of a better word). So basically, I am just going to document a few things in our lives, as if in a diary, and you may choose to stop reading the rant or ramble at any point in time.
Me: I serve an amazing God. He has never failed me and continues to love me beyond my understanding. I have been in prayer for God to show me who I am now and who he wants me to be. Show me the wife he wants me to be and the mom he wants me to be. To guide me to his will. I love being a mom and I enjoy being a wife. He gave me a wonderful family. But I also know that God gave me a gift, as he gave us all one. We were each born with a spiritual gift. I have prayed to find out what that gift is and have a better understanding of why he made me the way I am. How am I? Well this is what I have learned so far. I am strong. (most women are) But seriously, I am a fighter. I am tough. I am a leader. (though I have not utilized that gift very well) I am also a loner. I enjoy being alone. I am also extremely skeptical of people and I am a realist! That is probably the most important thing. I take things for what they are and look at what is in front of me. I want to know what is going on and have a grasp. I am not crazy about surprises that make me feel out of control or helpless. I have found every Christmas gift I was to ever receive since I was very young. And not on accident. I mastered the art of partially unwrapping a present just to know. It has always been a joke but I tried to figure out why I do that...Basically, I want to KNOW! I do not want to be caught off guard. I even do it with my own husband. He knows this so our Christmas to each other can be somewhat unorthodox. I can get rather irritated if I am caught off guard. I am determined. I am a control freak. If I am not given control over something, I am not myself at all. So many times I can walk into a situation and break down and analyze it. If I do not hold the cards, I will not be at my best. Volunteering for things are not my strong suit b/c I walk into a situation that has already been established. I walk in and I am given a tiny run down of what to do and that isn't good enough for me. I have so many more questions & the need to make it more complicated and do it differently. I could go on but I think you get the point. Some qualities good, and many BAD! Needless to say, God gave me the gift of administration. LOL I have more I could say about me and my personal growth and plans or goals that I have made but who wants an entire blog on me. Should we add selfish to that? Hey, its my blog and I will do what I want! :)
I will add another small note about myself. In search for a job change. I have an interview tomorrow and pray it goes well. It is really all about the direction God wants me to go in. I want to step out onto the water with faith and peace.
So onto me familia:
I could never be more proud of my children. They are growing into such beautiful young girls with two completely different personalities. They have such a great relationship. I actually get envious of their relationship and that I do not have that with my own sister. People ask all the time if they get along or if they fight a lot, to which I reply,"They adore each other and get along great. They have their moments but its funny how God plans things. If Morgan had been the first born, it would be a totally different story."
Mallory is my sweet angelic daughter. She has a big heart and I can not wait to see the plans God has for her. She takes after me in many ways. She is a leader and rarely gets afraid. She is very confident and extremely smart. She finished 1st grade with a certificate of merit in every subject in addition to A honor roll the entire year. She is reading and doing many things on a 3rd grade level. She is a great big sister and supports Morgan and encourages her. Many times she mothers Morgan and I have to draw the reigns back in a little bit b/c I want her to enjoy being a kid. It may sound silly but she can act a little too grown up from time to time. At the age of 6, Mallory witnessed to a neighborhood boy for the first time. I was so proud of her and my heart ached for the little boy and his family situation. I could actually see the hurt in Mallory's eyes when she told me that he had no clue who Jesus was and that he told her Jesus did not love him. However, she planted the seed. I realized how this made me feel, and then it hit me...."if I feel like this, imagine what God feels like?" WOW! That really shook me up. We have been getting ready for her first kids camp experience and I am so excited to see what God has in store for her! She has learned so much and been encouraged by so many people throughout this school year. We have enjoyed having Mrs.Betsy Smith as her teacher. I could not have asked for a better year with her and looking forward to more to come. Below is a picture of Mallory as an Angel Fish in the "Go Fish" production for Fine Arts Night at KCS. It was too cute!
Morgan is a determined child. She wants what she wants and goes after it. She is my little comedian and surprises me with her ability to understand jokes. The things that come out of her mouth and the faces she makes can not be portrayed into words. It would not do her justice. She has grown up a lot here lately. She has entered into 4K at school and is so excited about going on a few field trips this year. She is even more excited about getting one year closer to going to KCS and being in big girl school with her big sister. Sometimes I find it hard to punish Morgan because she always seems to say something that will make me want to die laughing right before she gets a spanking. Example: Tears are streaming down her face. She is apologizing to Mallory as Mallory is walking to me to tattle tell on what Morgan just said. Granted, she had been warned previously and we discussed her using these certain few words. She knew what was coming. I took her into the bedroom and we talked and she received a spanking. I told her that those words were not to come out of her mouth again and we should remove them from our mind and mouth. Crying and catching her breath she said, "I cant momma. They are in my mouth and they wont go away. They just want to come out and I can't stop it!!!!" Trying not to laugh, we prayed. So below are a few pictures of the girls over the past few months. I know it was long but I warned you! At least I probably wont blog for another few months or so......
This was all Morgan wanted for her birthday. A pair of glasses like Nana's. Luckily, we found some play glasses online.
Until next time....
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
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